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ggrobot
Elite Member
Joined: 28 May 2004
Posts: 53567
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 Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 10:17 am Post subject: Star Wars: The Force Awakens Trailer (Official) [40455] |
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Watch the official trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens, coming to
theaters December 18, 2015.
Read more...
Source: GGMania headlines
GGMania.com - Daily Gaming and Tech news |
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Koogle
Elite Member
Joined: 08 Jun 2004
Posts: 1362
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| Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 4:18 pm Post subject: |
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The farce continues... looks like it will be good mindless garbage to watch.
Found this youtube comment.. made me lol
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If Star Wars Episode IV was made today:
Lucia Skywalker is a strong independent womyn of hispanic descent who don't need no man, making a living on the city planet of tatooine as CEO of an interplanetary corporation and part-time veterenarian, when one day while feeding the homeless comes across Threepio, an effeminate gay white man and his robot side kick who ask her help in finding Kenobi, an guy who went into hiding decades ago. Threepio is on the run from the empire because they don't like gays, and Lucia sympathises because no one should be persecuted for whom he loves. Being hyper-competent at everything, she immediately finds Kenobis whereabouts and brings the duo to him. Threepio and R2D2 then reveal that they are seeking to compose a rescue mission to free Princess Leia from the clutches of the Empire aboard the Death Cannon. Kenobi, an older white guy informs Lucia that she has been chosen by the cosmos to fight the Empire, a patriarchal organization of white people, and thus should come with them. When an altercation with peaceful sand people occurs and Kenobi slaughters them instead of negotiating like Lucia attempts, Lucia decides however that Kenobi is evil and kills him with his own light saber.
She hires Han Solo, a black man's man, pilot of a stealthy ship who is himself introduced by gunning down dozens of imperial Storm Troopers. He is accompanied by a 7ft white Manbaby wearing a fox costume. On the way to the Death Wang, Han and Lucia have sex. When they arrive at the Death Cannon, it appears to be a moon-sized phallic implement. The Death Cannon captures the stealth ship nevertheless but the crew is able to sneak aboard.
Through cunning and imperial incompetence, nobody is looking though Lucias Storm Trooper disguise and they manage to free Princess Leia, who turns out to be a transgender, thus the Princess monicker. Threepio and Princess reveal that they are lovers. Princess suggest they must escape to the Rebellion. Darth Vader, a blonde guy with blue eyes and force powers engages them, delivering lines like "Your place is in the kitchen, girl". A battle ensues and Lucia uses her new found magical Force powers for which she needed no training since she was chosen by the universe, and fight their way out of the Death Phallus, but the empire remains in close pursuit. Fursuit manbaby dies during the fight.
Arriving at the secret rebel hideout Lucia, backed by Princess, calls to action all rebel pilots in a rousing speech and leads a fleet of diverse Pilots of various genders and orientations against the heteronormative Death Cock. A duel between Blond Vader and Han Dindu happens that is narrowly decided in favor of Dindu. Most rebel Fighters die but Lucia single-handedly destroys the Death Penis using a fighter craft that she has never piloted before. Later she marries Han Dindu and they are having 2.3 children and live in a house with a white fence in the suburbs.
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El_Coyote
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Joined: 09 Jun 2004
Posts: 611
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| Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 6:27 pm Post subject: |
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| I love the trailer, but I'm also not perpetually angry at life. |
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zarlin
Junior Member
Joined: 26 Jun 2010
Posts: 180
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| Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 10:18 pm Post subject: |
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Looks good  nice to see some of the old cast |
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