Gameguru Mania

[CaptStar]

A Hellish Paradise

As I walk through the base were everyone’s dead, I take a look at this guy and I ask “where is his head?”
But that’s just perfect for a marine like me, cause I love things like lights and electricity.
At 4:30 in the morning I’m killing imps, Joe and Jerry kill the demons and Jacob limps, fool.
But I’ve been killing and bleeding so long that, even Joseph thinks that my arm is gone.
I’m a man of the base, I’m about to wear thin, I got a shotgun in my hand and some blood on my chin.
So if you kill all the demons, and I kill all mine, then tonight were gonna party like its 2099.

<Chorus>
We’ve been spending most our lives, living in a Hellish Paradise,
I kill demons once or twice, living in a Hellish Paradise,
Its bloody work and sacrifice, living in a Hellish Paradise,
We kill imps while eating rice, living in a Hellish Paradise.

A Pinky Demon kicked me in the butt last week,
I just smiled at him, and I shot off his other cheek.
I don’t really care, in fact I wish him well.
Because I’m laughing my head off, as he be rotting in Hell.
I ain’t ever punched a nerd even if he deserved it,
cause a marine with a demerit, you know that’s unheard of.
I never wear a suit, but I got a cool helmet
And my homies agree I really look good in green, fool.
If you come to visit you’ll be scared to tears,
we haven’t eaten in what supposedly seems like 300 years.
But we ain’t really dead, so please don’t point and stare,
We just are extremely cold and scared.

There’s no lights, no babes, no hovercars, not a single luxury.
Like Robinson Crusoe, it’s as bloody as can be,





<Chorus>
We’ve been spending most our lives living in a Hellish Paradise,
We’re just dead and bleeding guys living in a Hellish Paradise,
There’s no time for gin and ice, living in a Hellish Paradise,
We all fight; we don’t play nice, living in a Hellish Paradise.

Killing all the zombies, bleeding in the gutter, kill an imp on Monday,
Soon I kill another.
Think you’re really brave; think you’re pure in heart,
I just know I’m a million times as humble as thou art.
I’m the coolest guy all the marines want to be,
On my knees day night, scoring points in the afterlife.
So don’t be crying and don’t be whiney,
Or else me and my friends might have to get medieval on your hiny.

<Chorus>
We’ve been spending most our lives, living in a Hellish Paradise,
We’re all crazy, me and the guys, living in a Hellish Paradise,
There’s no beer or coke and ice living in a Hellish Paradise,
But you’d probably think it bites, living in a Hellish Paradise.

Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah,
Yech!

Lyrics by Jared Norman
Song Idea from Gangsta’s Paradise and Amish Paradise
Thanks to Tyler Norman and Kaveh Farokhi for the ideas.